”I opened up a yogurt and underneath the lid it said, 'Please try again', for a contest I was unaware of. I thought maybe Yoplait was trying to inspire me... 'Come on Mitchell, don't give up!' An inspirational message from your friends at Yoplait, fruit on the bottom, hope on top.” – Mitch HedbergIf you’ve ever lost your job – been laid-off, had an employer go belly-up on you, been downsized, gotten canned – you know that after all the fallout has been washed away, what you’re doing is 'starting over'. Possibly even the first time since college. Or high school. You have an opportunity here, Bob. This is a rebirth. This is the first step of a process that will end with you in a new job that fulfills you.
I won’t mince words: starting over sucks. You’re in a job, a regular paycheck, a spot for your mug by the coffee maker, a place to be every day. Suddenly, not. Suddenly, the alarm clock goes off and you have nowhere to go. Suddenly, there is no direct deposit every other Friday. But this is reality. Your new reality. Involuntary change.
I completely started over again a year ago when I was unwillingly introduced to the laid-off life. And, yes, it sucked. But I got in to a rhythm, started back up the hill. But then, four months ago, I had to completely start over again. Suck times two. How did that happen? Let’s call them speed bumps along the job search. This road to employment enjoys throwing unexpected obstacles in your way. The best laid plans, you know.
The following is based on a true story. The names have been changed to protect the distraught and confused. Your mileage may vary.
Eight months after I was laid off, I got an interview for a great job. It was very similar to what I was looking for. It was creative, it was progressive, it was social-network-oriented. It seemed such a good fit that I didn’t care if it was in Jersey, forcing me to transverse the Betsy Ross twice a day. I went to the interview and nailed it. A few days later, a job offer was sitting in my inbox. I accepted the position, was informed of a start date, and began the process to transition from unemployed to IGotAJobIGotAJobIGotAJob. I told all of my friends, informed my freelance clients, broke out my old office coffee cup, and bought some new work clothes.
- But little Mouse, you are not alone,
In proving foresight may be vain:
The best laid schemes of mice and men
Go often askew,
And leave us nothing but grief and pain,
For promised joy!
Somewhere in between accepting the job and starting the job, somewhere while I was safely counting un-hatched chickens, something went askew. I was summarily informed, via curt phone call from someone I hadn’t heard of before (not George Clooney), that the position I was hired for was no longer available. I was stunned and confused. I timidly asked why, and was told that there was no further information available to me, and this decision was final. I called the person who hired me, I called the person who would had been my boss. Again I was told that there was no further information.
There is this law, this horrible doctrine that exists, called hire- (or fire-) at-will. Legally, it is called "at-will employment", explained as "any hiring is presumed to be 'at will'; that is, the employer is free to discharge individuals 'for good cause, or bad cause, or no cause at all', provided no prior express contact or unlawful discrimination exists". Forty-three states in the US (including Pennsylvania, New Jersey, and Delaware) allow such actions. And what they means is, that if you don’t have a contract with your employer and your employer isn’t discriminating against you, they can fire you whenever they want, however they want, for whatever reason they want. And they are under no obligation to even tell you why. If you didn’t know about this before, you best familiarize yourself with it.
Conversely, they say, it goes both ways, meaning you can quit for any reason you wish as well. But frankly, how many times is that needed compared to how often companies are the one wishing to part ways while hiding behind this law? That reflexivity is, I suppose, how the companies can live with themselves. Well, you can quit as easily as we can fire you, so it’s good for both of us. Bull. I know from the employer standpoint, there are good reasons for this law existing, and a good HR person can tell you why by rote. But as a regular ol' workaday employee, it’s chicken, says no one but me.
I was suddenly unemployed again, starting over again. I had no idea what to do. I even called one of those free-consultation attorneys who told me that the statute really sucks, and is completely unfair, but was the law and I had no recourse. I never did find out why I was fired before I started. At least I know it wasn’t because of my work performance. It could have been a million things. But I’ll never know. What I do know is that the position was never re-posted on any job sites, and I never saw any further job openings at the company locally which left me to believe that the position, and possibly the whole department (which was tied to the auto industry, so you know, not the field to be in at the time), was eliminated or downsized. Or maybe in retrospect, they just didn’t like me. Who knows.And in the time since, I heard some pretty negative things about the company, and I’m not sure I would had been happy with the job, much less the commute, so maybe all worked out in the end. You never know, and I’m a true believer in the philosophy that everything happens for a reason. And, as many suggested to me, who would want to work for a company that would do that to someone and not even tell them why? Point taken.
Welcome back to starting over Michael, we missed you. And, as it turns out, that wasn't the last time I had to start over (amazing how close you can get to a job without actually getting the job). But, on the bright side, at least now I had at least a modicum of perspective on that starting over. I was prepared, in most ways, to hit the pavement again anew. I needed to grasp the accepting the things I cannot change part of the Serenity Prayer because, frankly, what is the other choice?
So what did we learn today? First, I hope you’re now enlightened to 'at-will employment' if you were not already aware of it. Ignorance of the law is no excuse. Don’t get blindsided. Second, starting over sucks. And it will happen to you many times in your life, so you best be prepared. And it’s usually not voluntary. Starting over will most times be thrust upon you without your consent. Your destiny is often not of your control, and free will isn’t always yours. Someone else can so easily say 'I’ve changed my mind' and suddenly you are on an unexpected detour or back to square one. Continue to look forward, do your best, prepare for the worst, and accept the changes when they happen to you.
Because life isn’t always at-will.
Michael Hochman
LaidOffLife@yahoo.com ◙ Laid-Off Life on Twitter ◙ Laid-Off Life on Facebook
Michael is a Copywriter, Creative Marketer, and Broadcasting Professional still in search of full-time employment after 12 months of full-time job hunting, thanks to an “involuntary career sabbatical”. A Philly native and Syracuse graduate, Michael will gladly accept any job offer you may have for him. Any. Really. Please give me a job??"Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called everybody, and they meet at the bar." - Drew Carey
